Friday, May 9, 2014

Sugar is the Devil

So I've been doing pretty good about my new way of eating. I went 4 weeks with absolutely NO sugar. Vegetables, meat (organic), eggs (organic), and fruit (only low sugar, so basically berries). It was amazing. My skin was clearer, I wasn't bloated, and I could wake up at 5:30 to hit the gym with no problem. All good. Fast forward to last Sunday. My dad was coming for a visit so I decided to make him a good dinner: lasagna and chocolate cake. I ate well all day and was feeling fine. We had dinner around 7 and I had a small helping of both. No big deal! I was still feeling good and knew I'd be right back on track the next day. NOT SO MUCH. I woke up the next morning feeling like I got hit by a truck. I was exhausted, light headed,  nauseous, had a runny nose, and my contacts felt like they were super glued to my eyes all day long. Not to mention the loooovely mood it put me in. I mean all the above sypmtoms plus 11 hours of preschool are enough to make any person crabby but it was more that. I just felt like crying. I got home and just crashed. The only perk was that it got me a bunch of extra foot rubbing and arm tickling from Josh. 

You would think I would have earned my lesson right? Well not I. The lasagna/cake incident occurred on Monday and on Wednesday I got a couple very sweet teacher appreciation gifts, one being a planter filled with Hershey kisses. One of my weaknesses to be sure. This will demonstrate the depth of my will power which is none. None will power. I mean c'mon! I'm a good teacher darn it! And a hungry one at that. I deserve theseeeeee. I did have smarts enough to pass the candy around the daycare first so that I wasn't left with 5lbs of chocolate but still. 10 kisses later and I was out. It happened quite a bit faster this time and right in the middle of my shift. Exhaustion, runny nose and eyes, nausea, and just a general fuzziness. To be honest, I don't really know what to call it. I don't know if it's just an intolerance to sugar? An allergy? Whatever it is it's not good and I don't want to feel like that anytime soon, ESPECIALLY since it's mostly under my control. 

That being said it's still really hard. I'm supposed to be getting a laparoscopy soon to see if I have endometriosis. Regardless I know that I have PCOS. Right now those two things to be the most bothersome. Last night even though I'd been feeling a little better (recovering from the sugar come) I started to get some pretty bad pelvic pain out of no where and just started to cry. It wasn't that it hurt that bad, it was that it feels like there's always something. I NEVER feel good and Its very disconcerting to know that even my hormones are being effected and there may not be much I can do about it. I know that by eating better and living a healthy lifestyle I can go control a lot of what's going on with me and I know it's true. When I was doing really well I felt a lot better, but it wasn't completely gone. Whatever is giving me issues besides the PCOS is making things difficult.  Maybe it's endometriosis maybe it isn't but whatever it is, it's making me feel like it's getting in the way of my progress with PCOS and fibromyalgia and all the other sugar related issues I have. Ugh. This was quite the rant but I feel better having got it off my chest. I know that I can do better and I know my Jesus will get me through the difficult days. He already has. And even though I just listed off all the negative from the last few days, there has been plenty of joy mixed in and plenty of love as well. I've been back on track the past two days and am feeling better already. I'm gonna keep it up! I know this will be a long road but I've got a wonderful family, friends, and great God to her me though! 

Love & Prayers,

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